Sending Rejection Texts After “Enjoying” a Date

5 Ways to Let Them Down Easy

@gabbois

It's difficult to turn someone down after a first date. With online dating, neither party really knows how well the match will work. The text you exchanged before validated both of your abilities to converse, but taking the match face to face is always the true testament to your compatibility sans the algorithm.

First dates can be many things. A great chat or a slow, sometimes brutal, conversation. A seamless weave and flow, but neither passes Go. A kind drinking partner who never jumps over the friendship line. A dreaded goodbye, while you try to think of ways to avoid the first kiss. 

When both respectable parties understand the flame has lost its heat, going your separate ways is easier. But when you’re the only one feeling the cold, it can be harder to wave the white flag alone. All your personal indications of emotional and physical attraction never made their appearance. The soft-touch of an arm, the subtle kiss of the knees under the table, or the cheeky look at their lips as they talk. Your show of attraction sat at an opposing table.

It’s hard to decipher how you really feel about someone after only one date. Sometimes a second date is important to solidify your feelings towards this person… this stranger. But then other times, you just know.

And that’s what we are here for. To help you send that dreaded rejection text that keeps the nasty ghosts away.

Being the one who couldn’t find the spark is frustrating, so we’ve pulled together five of our favorite go-to rejection texts to let them down easily.

For when you’ve already discussed a second date… 

I had a great time getting to know you last week, but I think it is best if we don’t go forward with dinner. You were lovely, but after taking some time to think, I’m not sure if I am there romantically. Truly wish you the best!

For when your lips didn’t align…

Thank you for last night! I had such a good time chatting with you. Sadly, I am only feeling friendship vibes between us. Truly had a great time getting to know you.

For when you don’t know what you want, but know it’s not them…

Last night was fun! We should hold off on future dates. I am not sure what I am looking for dating wise right now, and you were so lovely and kind. I don’t want to lead you on. Wishing you only the best! 

For when you can shoot the shit, but your libido left the table… 

Loved chatting with you yesterday! I had such an awesome time! If I’m being honest, I didn’t feel that romantic connection between us. Not sure if you’re up for it but would love to stay friends. No pressure if that’s not what you’re looking for.

To rip the band-aid off…

Thank you for dinner! I had a lovely time but don’t think we should continue on another date. Best of luck! 

Sending a rejection text can be incredibly daunting. Try getting together with your friends for emotional support. If you can’t be with them in person, have them Facetime you as you send the texts. Hearing words of positive affirmations that you’ve made the right decision is encouraging. Letting them down easy is always better than ghosting.

Sometimes ghosting is necessary… check out our take on boundaries vs. ghosting. Looking to start online dating? Here are some tips to get you back in the game.