What Rat Girl Summer and Hyper-Femininity Means for Dating
📷: @stevie_jadeePop Culture’s Summer of Women and How Rat Girl Summer Translates Feminism for Girls Everywhere
By Stevie Bowen
August 16th, 2023
It’s no question that summer 2023 is for the girls. Female empowerment is ringing from cinemas, phone screens, and stadiums alike. We’re banded together by Taylor Swift friendship bracelets. Spreading beyond Swiftie loyalists to spectators outside of the concert walls. Our inner powerhouses are fueled by Beyoncé’s Loewe “hands” bodysuit, extending strength from her sparkly bodice. Plus, witnessing her pride for Blue Ivy stirs instinctual motherly connection even in those who don’t want children. America Ferrera solidified our womanly bond in her Barbie monologue that made us feel the most seen we’ve felt in years. Not to forget women without sparkly outfits, who draw inspiration from Greta Gerwig. The director who made the B in Barbie stand for ‘billions’, not Barbie. This summer feels like we may have finally found a durable path to lift each other up. Despite the culturally lost Barbie one-star reviewers.
The longevity of the movement seems promising as ticket sales soar, and news feeds continue to highlight the ongoing triumphs of women. But as everyone can’t obtain coveted Swiftie and Beyhive golden tickets or paint our entire lives pink, the survival of pop culture’s efforts comes down to us. The ordinary Barbies wandering the streets of the patriarchy. Between the start of the Era and Renaissance tours and the lucrative efforts of Barbie’s marketing team, comes rat girl summer. TikTok trend by screenwriter and content creator Lola Kola makes the pop culture feminist movement attainable for girls everywhere.
What is Rat Girl Summer?
Beginning from Lola Kola’s TikTok in June 2023, Rat girl summer rules encourage girls to live unapologetically and scurry around the streets. Emphasis on the word ‘streets’, “You cannot scurry in bed, you cannot scurry on your couch, you need to leave your home.” Women must go outside and take up space. Rat girl summer “kills the cringe.” We’re living for the moments that make us happy and unhinged. And we’re not embarrassed about it. The most important rule of Kola’s rat girl summer is the end of overthinking. “Do you think rats think twice before stealing a slice of pizza?” Overthink and we’ve lost our pizza. Aka, the one thing our intuition told us to do.
Rat girl summer rules are the logical steps that pop culture is trying to tell us. Kola translates the message from the blur of the glamour. We’re living for the moments that feel right, even if there’s mayhem behind the curtain. On the heels, or shall I say, the path that Barbie walks upon, is rat girl summer’s ode to decentering men or romantic relationships. This does not say wanting romantic relationships is bad. The efforts are about shifting the focus to oneself rather than prioritizing the gaze of males or potential partners. It’s spending our time “shaking our asses, making dentist appointments, and literally anything else.”
But if we’re focusing on ourselves, what does rat girl summer and pop culture’s summer of women mean for dating?
Dating becomes more successful and relationships more fulfilling. Without the laser focus on finding someone for the sake of having someone, the dates we find by listening to our intuition are more pleasant. We’re improving our health by eating nutritious meals and boosting our vitamin D. Our mental health is taking center stage, rather than the pressure of societal expectations. Collectively, we’re getting stronger. Becoming steadfast in our decision-making and trusting our gut. Two essential things for dating mindfully.
Some may claim the pop cultural movement of decentering men discourages dating them. On the contrary, it encourages men to grow emotionally and culturally. Ken gets hotter when he becomes more self-aware. Relationships are healthier when those in them bring their best selves. Men stop obsessing over women, women start obsessing over themselves, and everyone shines independently. To each their own in a perfect world, until we find someone to shine together with. Unfortunately, perfection doesn’t exist. For good reason. But the trying efforts to balance the scale create a better dating environment. As women gain self-confidence and men gain emotional awareness, voices grow with kind conviction. Communication improves when we can express our needs and wants.
Listening to our intuition is a key element to finding balance in our dating lives. We don’t live to date, but date to enhance our lives. Increasing our stability and celebrating our womanly strengths and flaws helps us make dating decisions that align with our goals. Not the goals of societal standards. If shaking ass in our pink sparkly outfits makes us happy, then let that shine for the rest of the world to see. We raise our frequency when we nurture our internal happiness. In turn, the frequency that speaks to our truest self attracts complimentary energy. We win the dating game by letting relationships naturally form with us. Let them grow towards you, not you towards them. Shine by breaking the chains, not by polishing them. In the words of Kola, “Rat girl summer is about liberation. To freedom!” Echoing from the roofs of stadiums, movie theatres, and TikTok, women can be anything. With or without a partner. Females can create their own reality. And the best part is, dating and romantic relationships will still be there. Fitted within each of our realities by our own standards.